Here’s what you need to do to last longer in bed
Lasting longer in bed can prolong pleasure and give a person a greater sense of control.
Being able to continue sexual activities for longer periods may help all parties have satisfactory sex and achieve orgasm. It’s common to feel like you want to last longer in bed, especially if you ejaculate prematurely. If you are worried that you finish too quickly in bed, you’re not alone — around one in three men report having issues with premature ejaculation. It’s unclear why this happens, but scientists think it’s a combination of psychological and biological factors. If you aren’t able to have sex for as long as you would like, there are several strategies that can help.
Getting support from your partner can be an important part of the process. To begin with, tell your partner that you want to try lasting longer in bed, and ask your partner if they’re interested in that. This may help your partner understand what’s going on and help you talk openly about any feelings of frustration. Once communication is open with your partner, you can discuss exactly what triggers your orgasm and try practicing the following methods.
Since premature ejaculation may be a result of hypersensitivity, using a condom is a simple solution that may make you last longer in bed. The condom forms a barrier around the penis that dulls sensation and may lead to delayed ejaculation.
The pause-squeeze method can be done while having sex or masturbating and involves: having sex until you feel that you are about to ejaculate, then, pulling out and squeezing the tip of your penis for several seconds, or until the need to ejaculate passes. And finally, continuing to have sex and repeating the technique as needed.
Your pelvic floor muscles lie just below your prostate and your rectum and just like other muscles, they can be strengthened through exercise. Experts believe that if pelvic floor muscles are too weak, it may be harder for you to delay your ejaculation and help you to last longer in bed.
Thrusting quickly creates intense stimulation and may make you more likely to orgasm after a short time. Thrusting quickly can also make it harder to recognize more subtle sensations in your body, and you may not realize that you’re getting close to orgasm. Try to move at a slower pace, and regularly take little breaks to move extra-slow. You may be surprised that some partners might like slower movement, especially at the start of sex. Positions that limit your movement, like having your partner on top, can also be helpful because you aren’t able to lose control and start thrusting too quickly.
Masturbating before sex can help you last longer in bed, since your body won’t be as sensitive to sexual stimulation. It may take some trial and error to find out how long before sex you should masturbate. Because if you masturbate right before sex, it might be difficult to get an erection again, so soon. But if you orgasm too many hours beforehand, you might be completely reset by the time you have sex and ejaculate too quickly.
Another option is to distract yourself with other thoughts, including something mundane like what you’ll eat for dinner or a movie you saw last week. This can help bring your mind away from the pleasurable sensations you’re having and may briefly delay ejaculation. However, it may also take away from your enjoyment of sex and your intimacy with your partner. You can try and see if this method helps you last longer in bed at certain times, but overall, remember to stay present and connected to your partner during sex.
Prescription numbing medications use ingredients like lidocaine and prilocaine, which generally come as creams or sprays that will decrease sensitivity, and can be a helpful way to treat premature ejaculation. Numbing creams or sprays should be carefully applied to the penis 20 to 30 minutes before sex to be most effective. You should also wash the cream away before having sex so it doesn’t affect your partner.
Viagra is usually prescribed to treat people who have trouble keeping an erection, research shows that it can help with premature ejaculation as well. A study found that Viagra helped men with premature ejaculation last longer and was more effective than the stop-squeeze technique. At the end of the study, 87% of subjects using Viagra said they wanted to continue this treatment to last longer in bed.
Focusing more on foreplay and less on penetration can help you last longer in bed for several reasons. For one, you’re likely to be taking breaks to change positions or to attend to your partner. It also gives you opportunities to employ techniques like the pause-squeeze method. Plus, by delaying penetrative sex, you’re prolonging the build up to orgasm, which can make climaxing feel more intense.