Tips for stimulating women’s G-spot
If you are looking for your G-spot – or your partner one - you’re not the only one.
If you’re not sure where the G-spot is, where to start or whether it even exists, we have some tips to show you the way. It’s relatively uncommon for women to orgasm through intercourse alone. In fact, according to a 2017 study, only about 18 percent of women achieve orgasm through penetration alone — meaning no hands, mouth, or toys needed.
More often than not, clitoral stimulation is required, or at least beneficial, when it comes to orgasming during sex. Orgasms can help reduce stress, improve your skin, and make you feel, well, great. However, for many women, orgasms — especially those achieved through penetration — can be just as elusive as the mysterious G spot.
The elusive G-spot is one of the most hotly debated areas when it comes to women’s sexual health. But despite what you may have been told in your (less-than-great) seventh grade sex education class, the G-spot most definitely exists and is absolutely accessible.
What is the G-spot? Where is the G-spot? Does the G-spot even exist? These questions have puzzled pleasure-seeking men, women, and scientists since the G-spot was first identified in the 1940s by German researcher Ernst Gräfenberg, after whom the spot is named. (The G does indeed stand for Gräfenberg).
In 2012, a scientific review came to the conclusion that there isn’t much anatomical proof that every person with a vulva has a G-spot, but anecdotal evidence and “reliable reports” say that there is indeed a specific area inside the vagina that, when stimulated, may help some vulva-owners reach orgasm. Researchers have found that the G-spot isn’t so much a spot as it is (likely) an extension of the clitoris. Instead of being its own separate spot in your vagina, the G spot is part of your clitoral network.
This means that when you’re stimulating the G spot, you’re actually stimulating part of the clitoris, which is much larger than we’re led to believe. Turns out, the pea-sized nub where the inner labia meet is actually only the tip of the clitoris and divides into two “roots” that can be about four inches long. Plus, this region can vary from woman to woman which explains why it can often be difficult to locate. However, once it’s stimulated, the G spot can cause female ejaculation (which is indeed real) and help women reach vaginal orgasm.
Finding the G spot can be difficult, especially since it’s not actually on any map of the human body. That doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Instead of searching for it during partnered sexual activity, it’s easier to locate the G spot through self-exploration.
First and foremost, make sure your hands are clean and your fingernails are trimmed, because you’re going to be putting them in a very sensitive place. Due to its tucked-away location, fingers are usually most effective at finding and stimulating the G-spot. Like anything else related to sex, foreplay is paramount if you are experiencing this with your partner.
Focus on kissing and caressing your partner’s lips, breasts, butt, and other non-genital hot spots for several minutes before getting down to business. The G-spot is composed of tissue that swells when it becomes aroused, therefore if your partner’s already turned on, it will be much easier for you to find it and go about pleasing them.
The G-spot is located about 2 inches inside of the vagina, on the top side of the vaginal wall. So, if your partner is on their back and you insert a finger with your palm facing the ceiling, the “top side” of their vagina is the spot you’ll touch by curling your finger in a come-hither motion, almost like you’re trying to stroke their belly button from the inside. If you’re having trouble, have your partner draw their knees back toward their chest to give your fingers better access.
Just as you wouldn’t forcefully jam your whole penis into your partner in a single movement, you should work your finger in slowly and softly. Once they seem comfortable with your finger inside of them, use that same curling motion to softly massage the top of their vagina with the pad of your finger.
If you feel a ribbed or textured area, you’re on the right track to the G-spot. You’ll know you found it because it will feel like a bean-shaped bump and maybe more textured than the surrounding tissue. Stroke the G-spot in a rhythmic motion, trying different speeds and amounts of pressure until you’ve found the one they most enjoy.
If your partner isn’t giving you feedback, don’t pick up the pace or increase the pressure, but rather ask them how it feels, and adjust your moves accordingly. If you’ve successfully worked your way to the G-spot and your partner is into it, you can even use your free hand to gently press on their belly, just above the top line of their pubic hair. Soft pressure on the outside can help stimulate their G-spot even more.