People have their own kind of adventure that can bring them to the edge of endless excitement. They experiment on what they have to make something fun, and these include sexual activities. When we combine the words fun, experiment, and sexual life, one thing will come into people’s mind, BDSM.

The meaning of BDSM

BDSM stands for Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, and Masochism. It includes the practice of a couple or partners on having characters in bed. The two characters are being dominant or submissive. Having the dominant part means that you are the one in control, while the submissive role is the other way around.

To a certain extent anything that deviates from social norms is considered taboo. But is BDSM still an actual taboo? In recent years there has been a huge sway towards accepting the more mainstream aspects of BDSM in everyday culture. You only need to consider the Fifty Shades series.

Fifty Shades of Grey made it so that everyone and their mom (especially their mom) could feel safe owning up to their desire to tie one another up, which makes the BDSM old-timers a little territorial, but mostly excited, because maybe our widespread enthusiasm will make their unjustly pathologized lifestyle more socially acceptable. So, is BDSM (bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism, and masochism) still a taboo practice? Is it an off-limits topic of conversation?

Is BDSM a taboo nowadays?

News network ABC (in America) report that between 15 to 20 percent of the American public have “done something kinky in the bedroom” with a rise in professionals teaching “regular people how to engage in non-standard sexual practices called ‘kink’”. Kink or kinky sex refers to the umbrella term to describe BDSM practices and the community.

Bondage encompasses the practice of tying, binding, or restraining of a person for the sexual, aesthetic, and/or psychological pleasure of the parties involved. According to Wikipedia, BDSM represents “a continuum of practices and expressions, both erotic and non-erotic, involving restraint, sensory stimulation, role-playing, and a variety of interpersonal dynamics”.

Some people consider BDSM as a taboo because of its violent implications. Others say that it is outside the norms of our society and that people who practice this must have some issues. Although most people view BDSM as taboo, there is a growing number of people who practice this. We all know that this activity is happening all over places, but we are just too in denial to admit. While some people try to ignore its presence, others are brave to tell the world about it through the following:

  • Movies and tv series: there have been a lot of movie releases that include a subtle mix of BDSM. Movies that include spanking or handcuffs are some examples. Others took it to extremes, and they have produced movies all about BDSM, portraying it with full demonstration or show.
  • Books and magazines: a lot of books are filled with all types of BDSM. And nowadays, even magazines contain articles about this topic, and some even give tips and advice to make your sexual fantasies extra enjoyable. These magazines even contain interviews and insights of people who practice the said activity and often include some things that you can use when you are interested in it.
  • The internet: you can type BDSM on your search bar, and a lot of articles are going to pop up for you to read. The internet also has sites that sell objects or items that people can use when they are involved in this kind of activity. You can find all types of things on the internet, actually!
bdsm

Moreover, in recent years this practice has become more and more geeky, as the lifestyle associated with BDSM shares so much with other nerd subcultures. For instance, in BDSM you can wear costumes and specific gear. Lots of nerdy hobbies require a lot of specialized gear, equipment, costumes, or clothing, which are valued on a scale of quality, originality, or historical accuracy.

Think of paddles, floggers, rigs, chains, cages, benches, and single tail whips.. not to mention the leather/latex/harness fashion component. Does this ring any bell? BDSM also has its own acronyms and arcana, just like many nerd activities. There is a high correlation between the nerdiness of an activity and the number of acronyms you need to memorize in order to participate. For example, World of Warcraft employs 288. The Times hints at an “alphabet soup’s worth” of terms in BDSM, for instance OTK (over the knee, to get spanked) or ABDL (adult baby, diaper lover).

Like all forms of sexual contact, it’s an area fraught with misunderstanding and miscommunication, hence the fact that it’s still be seen as a taboo in many places and cultures. Trust and consent are the most critical elements and if they’re not there or there is a potential for them to be confused, then that’s a major problem.