We’ve all been there. Getting over a breakup is not an easy task, and neither is it to determine weather you’re finally over a breakup or not. A bad breakup can be one of the worst experiences of your life. A broken heart has brutal side effects, but you will get through it. Breaking up is hard enough, and getting over a breakup and really moving on is the real challenge.

There is an art to breaking up with someone, and there’s a lot to be done to get over it. You have to get over the person, you have to get over the circumstances of the breakup — which are often unpleasant— and you have to put yourself back together enough to eventually really get over a breakup. The real problem is that it’s not always easy to tell that you’re over a breakup.

So if you want to know if you’re really ready to move on and you’re finally over a breakup, it’s important to take a look at yourself and how you’re actually dealing with said breakup. We have collected a series of signs that indicate that you are really, definitely, over a breakup aka your past relationship.

How to tell if you’re finally over a breakup

over a breakup

You have stopped the social media frenzy

Social media stalking is something we do without even realizing. Mindless scrolling can actually reveal something more – if someone is struggling through a breakup and fixated on their ex, staying actively engaged in the relationship through social media will make it harder to move forward. If, on the contrary, you’re not checking up on them on a regular basis, there’s a good chance that you’re finally over it.

You no longer talk or ruminate about them

The hardest part after your breakup was surely when everything you did reminded you about your ex. And when people are getting over a breakup they usually talk about it. All. The. Damn. Time. You just can’t stop talking about it and them and the two of you and every little facet of the relationship and its breakdown. So, if he’s no longer hijacking your every thought and he’s not your sole subject for conversation, it’s a very good sign that you’re over the breakup.

You have gotten rid of their stuff

Dump everything that reminds you of this person. If you’re still hoarding their things or mementos of the relationship, you’re not really letting go. If, on the contrary, you have managed to get rid of their stuff, it means you’ve managed to get rid of them in your life and that you truly want to let yourself move on.

You are interested in other people again

When you and your ex first broke up, you hit the bar scene with your best gal pals, but your heart just wasn’t it, no matter how many jolly rancher shots they plied you with. But now, eventually, you experience butterflies for the first time in forever. You’re probably not ready to jump into something serious, but it’s exciting to feel that spark with someone new.

You are excited about the future

You’re not afraid of the future but actually looking forward to what it holds for you and embrace it with full gusto. You’re starting to picture a happy future for yourself (one that doesn’t include him) or you’re feeling OK about the future being a mystery right now. Either way, you feel excited about what’s in store for you. More importantly, since you’ve wallowed in self-pity for long enough, you are again ready to embrace the fun, adventure and boundless possibilities inherent in singledom.

You have your own hobbies, friends, and life goals

If you can point to a handful of passions and hobbies you do for your own self-pleasure and fulfillment, it’s a sign you’re definitely over a breakup and probably ready to meet someone new. A person shouldn’t be in a relationship looking for happiness.

You are the creator of your own happiness in life, and a relationship should supplement it. You no longer miss your old relationship or feel compelled to run into the arms of someone else. You’re comfortable being alone and independent, and you’re confident that you don’t need a boyfriend to get by in life.

You no longer blame him for everything

In the past, the bitterness you experienced due to your breakup caused you to inject spiteful comments about him into every conversation. Now that part is over: you truly feel that the relationship wasn’t meant to be and that you’re that much closer to finding the one you are supposed to be with.